His Journal: The Untold Inner Monologue of Sir Gaslight-a-Lot (Vol. 2)

Working title: “Master Manipulator or Just a Guy with Wi-Fi and Rage Issues?”

Monday
Read her blog again. Can’t stop. It’s not about me, but also I’m offended, so it clearly is.

Texted 4 people:
“She’s obsessed with me.”
Called lawyer. “She’s harassing me.”
Filed complaint. “She’s unstable.”
Ordered latte. “She’s mean.”

Still convinced none of this proves my obsession. Just hers.

Tuesday
Told our daughters teacher she must only communicate with me now. Said “It’s safer this way.”
Also said “The mother is emotionally unstable.”
They nodded. I think.

Later, had a minor meltdown when my Nespresso machine broke. Blamed her. Wrote 600-word WhatsApp rant about how this is what she always does—sabotages everything.

Wednesday
Called the local council again. Told them she doesn’t really live here even though the judge said she can stay for 90 days.
When asked how I know, said:
“Well, I don’t see her when I peer through her blinds at 2am with night vision goggles.”
Sounded totally rational.

Also requested her mail be sent directly to me because… "security concerns."

Thursday
Tried to remember why I started this war. Was it control? Ego? Power?

Decided it’s “for the child.”
(And by child, I mean my inner child who throws tantrums when women have boundaries.)

Friday
Told my girlfriend I love how “low-maintenance” she is.
What I meant: she doesn’t question me.
She smiled. Poor thing.

Saw a therapist meme online and got mad.
“Therapy is brainwashing!” I yelled… from my car… while stalking her Instagram.

Saturday
Spotted her happy at the school sports day. Unacceptable.
Immediately tried to intercept our daughter first. Failed.
She got there first, so I sulked and pretended I wasn’t fuming.
Later told everyone: “She made a scene.”
Scene = smiling and saying hi.

Sunday
Still no response from that passive-aggressive mail I sent.
Upped the ante by implying I might report her again.
Because nothing says "healthy co-parenting" like veiled threats.

Currently brainstorming Part 3 of my memoir:
“Surviving Her Sanity: One Narcissist’s Tale of Misunderstood Greatness”